Attack of the Wild TSA

So this morning I had 2 cups of orange juice and 2 cups of coffee (caffeinated). Bad idea. We all know my bladder is the size of a pea (pun intended, please laugh), though, and I had to go as we got to the airport. The line for security was long, so I wanted to go before I had to wait in it. I left my stuff with a girl from the group and ran to the bathroom, but it was downstairs, so when I got back, I had to go through all the preliminary waiting/ticket checking again before security. When I got through the preliminary stuff, TSA was waiting for me.

“Are you the one who left your stuff?”

“Yes.”

“You need to wait here, TSA has to make sure there it’s safe.”

Crap. Fml. Really??! (interrobaaaang!)

“Can I at least pick my pillow up off the ground?” I asked, as I reached for my pillow.

“Don’t touch anything!”

“But… it’s on the ground… my pillow…”

“It’s been there for 5 minutes already, it isn’t going to get any cleaner.”

FFFF.

So I waited while I honored curious looks from fellow passengers who probably though I was smuggling in coke or something. A police dog came. “Hi, puppy!!” He ignored me and went right to my stuff. But with one sniff, he kept walking.

“Ok, it’s all right for you to go through.”

Well, thank the lord. Luckily, I got through and made it to the gate, where my group was waiting eagerly for a story. I think I live too dangerously. I think I need a lifestyle change.

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